I read an HBR article about how important it is to be able to relate the story of our life in a coherent way. My tragedy is that the two main factors that have shaped my story, namely my being gay and my visual disability , are not known to anyone . I turned out to be a good student because of the fear that being gay, instilled in me. In the University , I had a passionate gay love affair. Parting in the final year lead to my excessive drinking after joining my job. This lead to the near fatal accident which disabled me and led to a whole sequence of events that finally culminated in my leaving the job. An observer who does'nt know about my gayness and my disability might find my behaviour erratic, but to me it makes perfect sense. I dont like to be in a job because I feel very lonely working among people who will not accept me if I reveal my truth to them. That is the reason I hopped from job to job during my carerer. That is the reason for my applying for ESS. I could not imagine myself working for a company all my life. The ESS gave me some security and also the capital to start my own portfolio building in the stock market.
Again it was a gay friend who initiated me into the stockmarket.
I like to work alone because of the social hostility towards gays. I have not comitted any crime. Why then should I have to hide my real persona from everyone ? I do not want to be the useful member of a society which refuses to accept me as I am, and which has forced me into marriage with a girl, thus spoiling her life as well as mine. I just want to have enough money to fulfill my responsibilities. More money is not going to bring happiness into my joyless life.
I also read an article in the systems thinker about the three marriages in a persons life : to his self, to his work and to the relationships in his life.
Tomorrow I will review all the articles that I read today to absorb them better.
SURVEY
QUESTION
READ
REVIEW
RECALL
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